Drama, and Not What I Expected

It feels like I barely got home and I'm getting ready to leave again. Oh. Wait. That's actually what's going on.

I was across the street, talking to my neighbors about upcoming babysitting needs, when my husband came running across, yelling, "What did you have that was blue?"

Me: Huh?

Him: The little bug drank something blue and now her face and mouth and tongue and teeth are all blue. What was it?

Me: How should I know?

Him: It was on your desk.

Me: I don't have anything blue on my desk that's drinkable.

Him: Well you DID, and she DRANK it and I don't know what to DO!! She won't even TALK to me!

So I ran back across the street. My husband was still in a panic, complaining that our daughter wouldn't tell him AnYTHING. He did bring me the glass of the stuff she drank.

There was a black sludge in the glass and it was kind of stinky.

Our daughter was clearly scared and a bit traumatized, and I knew if I was going to find out exactly what she'd drank, I would have to be the calm parent.

Me: Honey, did you drink from this glass?

Her: (nods)

Me: Did you put something in it?

Her: (nods)

Me: Thank you for telling Mommy. Now, this is important. Can you show me what you put in the glass?

Her: No

Me: Do you mean you can't show me or you don't want to show me?

Her: It's all gone. I used all of it.

Me: Can you show me where it came from?

Her: (face lights up) YES! It was from this!

As she holds up a wrapper, I realized she had opened and poured a package of black Rit fabric dye into a glass of sparkling water.

As I tell my husband we need to call poison control, I'm scrambling through drawers trying to find the stickers with the number on them. Being unsuccessful, and him getting more impatient by the minute, I run over to my computer to Google "Poison Control." He's still in panic mode and asking what to do and I'm telling him to HANG ON, we might need to make her vomit.

Having been given something to DO, he hauls our daughter into the bathroom, while I yell, "NO NO NOT YET!" and dial Poison Control.

I get a very calm man on the phone and tell him what our daughter has ingested. I can't tell him how much since it's hard to judge how much of the sludge was dye and what might have been consumed.

The good news: it's non toxic, and ultimately, she will be fine.

The bad news: it's very high in sodium, so she may vomit and/or be a bit "spacey." Also, she should probably only vomit once, and if it's more than that, to take her in to urgent care to replenish fluids.

As I sigh in relief, he tells me, "Oh, the most important thing you need to know....TAKE PICTURES. You're going to need blackmail material in about 10 years or so."

This--the poison control guy telling me the most important thing is to get blackmail pictures--is a moment I will remember for a long, long time.

My husband is unable to find the humor in this event yet as he is still too traumatized.

And now I'm a little paranoid about leaving tomorrow for two nights.